You know you are sore when........

• you have to use a handrail to help you get up the steps
• you have to use a handrail to help you get down the steps
• you have to swivel around and lower both feet at the same time to get out of the car
• your hamstrings feel 3 inches shorter than they should be
• you have to get down on one knee to pick up something you drop
• when you have to manually lift your foot up to take off your shoe
  
  Pics of the race to follow tomorrow

Nike RunTO 10K

Today was a great day. Chris, Erika and I headed off to Toronto Island where we were taking part in the Nike RunTO 10K.

The weather at times was beautiful and at times awful. We arrived early to the island and just enjoyed the festivities that were going on. We took advantage of the free breakfast, listened to the bands and took part in a little light warm up (well most of us Chris was too cool to do it) and then we headed off for the race. We were split into sections to stagger the starts. The horns sounded and off we headed. It was a fun race, there were over 11,000 people there and everyone was wearing bright orange t-shirts.

I was anxious about taking part in this race because of a few factors
1. I haven't really trained as much as I could have
2. I was running on my own (Chris and Erika decided to pace themselves a little more)
3. I really love KFC food and that is a regular in my diet. So I haven't really been eating healthy.

I was quite proud of myself not only for the time that i completed it in but also for the fact that i didn't stop once. I just kept plugging on. I did realise though that I get extra motivation when I run as don't really like people overtaking me, and I like to get back in front of them. Right now as i am writing this I can feel my body getting stiffer. I was going to write gradually getting stiffer but this aint no gradual thing. Oh boy i am going to be sore tomorrow.

And my time: 50 mins 40 seconds.

It's Been Too Long

Sorry that I haven't been on top of my blog recently but things have been pretty busy these last few weeks.

Camping: The camping trip was great fun. The purpose of this trip is just to gel as a team, get to know each other and build massive campfires. We ate great meals together, played games together and Mike and I also went looking for some Moose. We were unsuccessful.

Baseball: I had the opportunity to go to a baseball game. It was a great game and that fact that it only cost $2 made it even better. The Jays were playing Boston and it had all the drama that you would hope. On the 9th inning both teams were level with 6 a piece. Boston bat first - nothing and then it was up to the Jays to produce some magic. We ended up having players on first and second base. Reed Johnson steps up to the plate - BOOM - Home Run. Final Score Boston 6 Toronto 9. Not often that a game ends like that. Good Game Boys.

Bearded Lady: While driving this week I pulled up to the lights and decided to see who was in the car next to me. Bad Mistake - there was a lady plucking hair from her chin. Gross.

Cottage: For the Long Weekend I headed off to Erika Schryer’s cottage. This is an amazing cottage as it was build by her dad. It is a big cottage and one of the best things I love about it is that there is no electricity. When you go there you take on what is called "cottage time". You put away anything that tells you the time and you eat when you are hungry and sleep when you are tired. I did realise that I am not really suited to cottage time. Eating when you are hungry and sleeping when you are tired really is a rule that I should not go by as I would be continually eating while I am in bed.

This trip was extremely relaxing as we just played games, went for hikes, chopped wood, built fires, went canoeing, and I did a spot of fishing. This turned out to be rather frustrating actually. Chris was taking a nap and Erika was reading. I thought that this would be a great time to do some more fishing. I dug up worms, gathered up all the gear I needed, dragged the canoe to the edge of the dock and set off. I must have been out there for easily 3 hours and caught.... nothing. At the end of my time I realised that I had fallen asleep in the canoe and was woken up to the sound of these 2 kids getting ready to fish off the end of their dock. They didn't have their lines in the water more than 30 seconds and they both caught a fish. At that point I packed up my stuff and headed back to land where I would sulk and take my frustration out by chopping more wood.

So that is a little of what i have been up to this past week or so. Did you do anything nice this week?

I will post pictures of these events when I get them on my computer. I won't be putting up a picture of the Bearded Lady.

freaky canadians

Why is it that at the end of movies Canadians feel the urge to clap. I was at the movies on Saturday and at the end of the movie it was almost like a standing ovation. The reason that they were standing was ultimately because they were leaving. But why the need to clap.

Weird.

God can still use lazy, spiteful people

For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also. Matt 6: 21.

This was the verse that the pastor was talking about on Sunday morning. He was saying that the things that we treasure can dictate the way we live out our lives. How that often we need to let go of things that have a grip on us.

For his example he talked about his Day-timer. And how that he didn’t realise how much he used and relied on it until he misplaced it. He realised that when he had his day-timer so much of his life was dictated by what it said. If people came to visit him he wouldn’t be able to meet them because maybe he had a meeting or a lunch appointment. Having the Day-timer meant that he had taken the ability to be flexible out of his life.

Yet he didn’t give up on looking for this day-timer. He visited the following places asking for his AWOL Day-timer: all the coffee shops he had been to over the past weeks, the grocery stores, his barber shop (twice), houses that he had visited and the list went on. In the end he went and bought a replacement, as he needed a basic one to remind him of meetings etc.

It was at this point that my whole body started to sweat; I felt sick; I went red in the face and slowly slouched down in the seat that I was sitting in. This day-timer that he had franticly been looking everywhere for and had taken a considerable amount of time to talk about was in fact in the truck that I have been driving. And to make it worse, I knew it was there all along. He had borrowed the truck while I was away in Michigan and when I retuned and was sitting in the truck about to leave I saw it there, above my head in behind the visor (if that is what it is called). I could have taken it into him immediately but I didn’t. (that was the laziness part)

I missed the main message of what Paul was preaching to us on Sunday morning because I learnt a lesson myself.

Not giving the Day-timer back was probably 30% laziness and 70% spite.

I had sent Paul an email a few weeks ago looking for some answers to questions that I had been thinking about, advice on what I was reading at that time, and books that could be helpful for futher study. Yet he still hadn’t replied. I remember joking with Jono that until he gives me back something that is important to me (the answers to my questions) then I would wait to give him back something that was important to him.

I would probably say that I am a little harsh on myself because I did have the book sitting on my front of the truck last week planning on giving it to him. But in my rush I forgot to bring it in.

Oops.

What made it worse was that towards the end of the service (still in church with everyone there) Chris Evans decided to announce to Paul, while he was still preaching that I did in fact have his Day-timer. Thanks Chris.

Won't forget that message for a while.

Camping Trip

On Tuesday myself and the rest of the Director Team for Muskoka Woods head off for a spot of camping. This is a great trip and one that i look forward to each year (wait - this is only my second trip)

It is a time for getting to know one another, fellowship, share ideas and stories, play some random games and it gives me the chance to make HUGE fires. I like fire.

I will give you an update on Friday of how the trip went.

What a horrible person I am

This event happened to me today and I feel that I need to share it with you all.

I was unable to finish my Chunky KitKat today.

I know - horrific, devastating, shocking, appalling, inexcusable . I don't know what to do. I nearly cried. I feel that my life hit a wall. I was travelling home from hanging out with Jono and Chris Evans and I noticed that I had a Chunky KitKat in my car (the King of Chocolate Bars). I opened it and after 3 bites I had to stop. I couldn’t continue. It was too much. I think I need counselling for this.

I have decided on the possibility of these two reasons as to why this event took place.

1. I had just been to the gym, so my body was still in 'I am going to be healthy mode' (what a crap excuse)

And the second

2. The Chunky KitKat has been in the car now for the past 5 days. The last number of days has seen our temperatures range between 7 degrees – 24 degrees. This KitKat has taken quite the amount of physical abuse with the heat. It has melted and reformed into what the wrapper allows it to form in numerous times. It was the most intense chocolate experience i have had, but it was too much. What a horrible person I am. Why would any one ever inflict that amount of pain on such an innocent bar of chocolate? What did he ever do to me? I don't think I will be able to sleep tonight.

As I write this I can see it looking at me – it is tempting me, but I can’t. It hurts that I can’t. I think I will have to go and set him in another room. It is too much, having him sitting there, watching me, judging me. He is probably thinking that I have someone else in my life, like a Twix or a Mars King-size. But I don’t, I promise – please believe me.
I want to apologise to all the other Chunky KitKats reading this. It will never happen again. You are still my favourite for now and for ever.

What Sad News

Today I received some very sad news. One of my favourite comedians Mitch Hedburg passed away on the 30th of March 2005. He was an extreemly talented comedian and will be missed by many.

A-B-C-D-E-F-G-H-?-?-?

You have probably gathered from my previous blogs that I am quite random, I think random thoughts, ask random questions, and experience random things.

Well today while I was driving into work I was thinking about the letters of the alphabet and singing the alphabet song to myself. I then came to wonder – who put the alphabet in the order that it is in? Was it the people that wrote the tune for the song? Is there any reasoning behind the order that we read it in?

Help!

I have been wondering for a while now where the term 'spitting image' came from. I know what it means and in which context to use it but what confuses me is why the word 'spitting' is included. Surely if two people spit it is not going to look the same. Especially if i have just eaten a Mars bar, and you have been drinking water for a few days.

I would really like some closure on this if anyone can help.

It's Official

While I was in my bed this morning, in between hitting the snooze button many times I decided that I would like to announce that my favourite pop (fizzy drink) is GINGER ALE.

Thank You

What a weird night!

Occasionally I have weird nights of sleeping. Whether it is where I wake up and realise that I am standing in the middle of the room, wake up in the morning and realise that I have switched to the opposite end of the bed, or jump off the top bunk and go to sleep on the floor (happened at Muskoka Woods). Last night was no exception and after sitting on the edge of my bed this morning for about 5 minutes I was able to piece this puzzle together.

You have heard of sleep walking, sleep talking and now you have heard of sleep eating.

I went to bed last night around 11.15 pm and i thought that i was out for the night. At 1.09 am I remember the phone ringing but being in a sleep mode I was unable to wake up to answer it. In my head I knew I needed to answer it but my body would not let me. The reason I wanted to answer it was because, let’s face it how many people phone me at 1.09 am in the morning.

As soon as the ringing stopped I can remember getting up and looking at my phone. I don’t remember the journey’s between the next few events I just remember being there. I remember standing in the bathroom looking in the mirror. This was a pointless event as the lights were not on – and I couldn’t see anything. I remember going into the spare room and flipping the matress over. I then remember sitting on my bed with my legs crossed (which I never do because it hurts) eating Bretton Crackers and Salsa dip. I know that this happened because my bed was covered in crumbs, my pillow had salsa on it and the crackers and salsa were sitting by my bed this morning. The funny thing is that I ate over half the box of crackers. And I remember leaving the crackers in the living room earlier that day, so part of my journey involved me travelling to the living room. I must try the combo again to see what it tastes like.

What a weird night.

So long farewell, auf weidersehen good-bye

Am I Mean

I was sitting out on the steps at the front of my house the other day thinking about how great the weather has been, plus i had burnt toast and the house smelt gross. While i was sitting there a car pulled up and the guy got up and came over to me. He asked if I was the Landlord - i am not - so i said no. He was meeting the Landlord at the house at 6pm to view it (because i am moving out at the end of May)

The more i chatted to him the more i want him to move in here whenever I leave. As you can tell i am not a huge fan of the folks downstairs. Well that is a lie, the husband Shawn is a great guy. Really nice to chat to, and very helpful. His wife on the other hand is not so pleasant.

I know what really annoys his wife because they are all the things that she has came to shout at me about. Those being: parking 2 cars in the driveway, the cable money due, music being played too loud, movies to loud, walking around with "steel shoes on", talking loud, not shoveling snow off the driveway and the list could go on.

(Which are all a joke: we walk around quietly, don’t make that much noise and one night the landlord came around to see us at 10.00pm and we were all in bed)

I asked him a few questions and what I got from him was - he will be moving in with 2 other male friends, they all have cars, he walks around like an elephant, they like parties (late parties) and he wants to put a table tennis table in the house. I couldn't help but smile.

So me being a really nice guy brought him in and showed him around the house. I used all my experience and knowledge of previously working in Sales & Marketing and really impressed him with the house.

I do hope he and his friends move in here.

PK 1 - 0 Basement people

(If you think that this is mean, I will update you in my next blog as to why she was going to call the police on me)

Incredibly Dumb

Last night around 7.40pm I was driving south on the 400 heading home (this is a major highway for those who are not Canadian). Two motorbikes screamed past me and as I didn’t see them or hear them coming, I jumped. They pulled in to the lane beside me and I couldn’t work out why they kept looking behind them as they rode.

The next thing I knew was that they guy checked back one more time, stood up and pulled a wheelie. Yes there was a guy, pulling a wheelie, while traveling south on the 400, traveling at 120 in the next lane to me.

Incredible, yet dumb. I stayed far enough back that I could still see well and appreciate this wonder, and also swerve if I needed to. I was prepared to administer my very basic first aid that learnt at a first aid course this past summer if he fell. He didn’t.

PK & Parents 

Our Trio's Down to Two

I can see what's happening
And they don't have a clue
They'll fall in love and here's the bottom line
Our trio's down to two. (Lion King)

The first three lines of that song have no relevance to what I am writing about; I am just using the last line.

OUR TRIO’S DOWN TO TWO

Today was a sad in the lives of 243 Johnston because our trio did become two. Cheryl moved out of our house today because on Tuesday she travels to India for a new and exciting adventure where she is going to be teaching. Good luck Cheryl.

SO that leaves myself and John Wood to battle with the crazy, psycho, foul mouthed freak who lives in the basement. Finally those months that we have been dreading have come upon us. She gave birth!

Usually what we have to cope each day with is:

• her partner clearing his throat in the morning (which I sleep through now)
  them arguing and using the most foul language that I have ever heard people shout at each other
• them shouting at the dogs when they bark even though the reason they bark is because they hardly ever let them out
• the TV as loud as being at the cinema
• her coming up to shout at me because I have parked the car in the wrong place or at the wrong angle
• or her reporting me (us) to the landlord and nearly to the police (that could be the next blog)

Now we have to put up with a crying baby, and her shouting at her partner saying “the f*ing baby won’t stop crying.” This would not be an environment that I would recommend a baby to be brought up in.

So Cheryl has gone, and tomorrow John Woods leaves to go to Europe for 3 weeks. I am home, alone with no support to help me cope with ‘ it ‘ downstairs. I suppose I could have started this part off with another line from a song. This is from the legendary band who will never be forgotten and we dream of the day that they will return and claim the world as their own - The Spice Girls - Two Become One......

Oh no, I can hear the baby warming up for a round of screaming. Time for the ear plugs. Good Night – I hope.

Oh My ! !

Oh My, I count unconsciously .

I don't know whether you know or not but I hate feet; I did mention it in an earlier blog I think. The summer for some people is a great thing, but some (like me) it definitely has a negative side. The feet come out. With it being warm, people feel that they should wear sandals. Usually buy the start of the summer I am used to them so the summer isn’t so bad, but the first month or so is challenging.

Do you ever do something but never realise that you do it and then WHAM you realise. I realised last summer that I do something but only remembered about it today. I count toes. I don't, know why, I can't explain it, I don't want to, I just do. I don’t do it all the time. But I do it sometimes. I need help.

Now I don't, walk around like some sicko looking for some victim in sandals that I can attack numerically. But sometimes I realise - that I have started sweating for no reason - unconscious of my behaviour - I am in a stare that can't be broken - the feeling of uncomfortable is now hitting a HIGH - overwhelmed - nauseous - then suddenly WHAM - I catch myself on, realising that in fact yes they do have the correct amount of toes that God gave them. I think that part of me would love to find someone with an extra toe so that I can point out why their feet are ugly. But to be honest I don,t know what I would do if I found someone with a toe missing or an extra one.

(I might possibly contact the two people and let the one that has a toe missing, that I know someone who has an extra toe so that they can approach them about maybe trading something for it. Like an extra finger if he has one and the other person has one less)

Wow, I feel the need to lie down.

My name is NOT André

There are not many things that I dislike about Canada but the one that tops the chart is how people get my name wrong. It happens a lot and it used to annoy me but now I have to see the humour in it. I didn’t think my accent is that strong – guess not

The worst place for this has to be one of my favorite food establishments, Licks, and the problem is when I am there usually Chris and Erika is with me. They find this very amusing and to stir the pot they call me André as much as possible when I am there.

At the start we thought that they were just saying it wrong but they actually write your name on the receipt. I have the evidence.

A couple of years ago I was at a conference in Toronto and this old lady thought that I was French, she got really annoyed when I called her an American. I laughed because she was really upset.

I think when I go in there I will start to use other names that could annoy them, names that are long and hard to spell like - Nebuchadnezzar, Belteshazzar, Zerubbabel, or a really hard one like ANDREW ! ! !

Eating My Own Vomit

I walked into the staff room where I work the other morning and Taryn was making herself breakfast. Being nosey I went and had a look at what she was making. She was having Oatmeal. It looked.... ok and smelt good so on the way home I decided that I would go and buy some. Instead of just buying one to try I bought a box that contained 12 packets of Apple Honey and Cinnamon Oatmeal.
I really wish that I had tried some of Taryns instead of buying this box. I don't now whether you have tried Oatmeal but it really isn't all that pleasant.
I don't see why people pay the money to eat something that feels like you are eating your own vomit. The texture of it in your mouth and as you 'try' to swallow this stuff really isn't an enjoyable experience.
The next day I tried something different. I got an apple and chopped it up and put it in the bowl of oatmeal thinking that this would make it better. No! All this did was make me feel like there were solids in my vomit.
I have been working my way through the box as I hate to see food go to waste. I have even tried adding extra honey to it, raisins, more water to make it less glupey (if that is a word). The worst was when I tried to put two packets together so that I would be able to get through this box quicker. Oh no...... I found myself gagging as I was eating; each mouthful was something that I had to work up to. I had to concentrate and attack it like I was attacking ......... something that you attack. I couldn't do it; I had to throw it out.
Do you ever think something and wish you hadn't thought of it because it really annoys you. Today I looked in this box and noticed that there is only one packet left. As soon as I noticed this I thought, 'why don't you give it to Taryn if she likes it so much?'
WHY DIDN'T I GIVE THEM ALL TO TARYN IF SHE LIKES THEM SO MUCH!!!!!
I think I will just stick to having no breakfast